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Not-so-consoling-windows friend

January 2, 2012

Phone rings, I answer.  It is consoling-windows friend.  I can see her house, and she can see mine, while we talk.

CWF:  Your tree looks beautiful.  The yellow one.

Me:  The gingko?

CWF: No, the big one.

Me:  That’s the gingko.

CWF:  Whatever.

Me: It’s the only good thing in the whole yard. Everything’s broken. Or a mess. Or a broken mess. For instance, right now I’m looking out the window, and I see leaves that need to be raked, the broken table on the deck, and the broken Adirondack chair, and the broken pieces of what used to be that cute little picnic table from Ikea.

CWF:  Go look out a different window.  That’s a terrible window.

Me:  Yeah, you’re right. This window sucks. I repudiate it.  (Marches over to different window.)

CWF:  So?

Me: Leaves, sticks, dead plants in the windowbox, the birdfeeder with the sparrow corpse still stuck in it, and the leaning fence.

CWF:  Oh.

Me:  Yeah.

CWF: (after a minute)  Listen, I’ll come over and help.  We’ll put everything in the garage and close the door.

Me:  The garage is still full of the crap furniture I got rid of this summer. I keep missing the big trash pickup.

CWF:  It was Thursday.

Me: Yeah. I forgot.

CWF: How’s the cat?

Me:  Still shitting. It’s your fault. You’re the one who picked her.

CWF:  I know. (Despairingly) Shall we go for a walk?

Me:  Yes, let’s go for a walk.

They do not move.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Jenertia permalink
    January 2, 2012 6:33 pm

    Ha! Like, “Waiting for Windot.”

    • irretrievablybroken permalink*
      January 2, 2012 7:11 pm

      Oh my god, you’re brilliant. That’s what I needed! The damned title eluded me and eluded me. I wrote this post weeks ago, and waited in vain (appropriately, I suppose) for inspiration. Thank you, thank you!

  2. bostongirl1 permalink
    January 2, 2012 9:58 pm

    I love your writing, really I do. I check here often to see if there is something new. I hope the new year treats you well and you have many moments of more positive experiences than this post 🙂

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