I’m so sorry. I have not been eaten by spiders or what have you. I did, in fact, have a wonderful time in Ecuador, and I have been meaning to write here ever since I got back. Then I left town suddenly for South Carolina to see my grandmother, whose health has been very poor, and then I came back, and I have been flailing about feeling sad (about her impending death) and lonely (having spent an unprecedented amount of time with my boyfriend in March, which makes going back to my regular life jarring and difficult). I worry, too, that this website may have reached its logical endpoint. (Not before I report on Ecuador, but soon.) My life these days is much calmer than when I started writing here, and though the divorce is still with me (obviously) I worry I’m just retreading the same ground, getting pissed off at my ex-husband, then marveling at how much progress we’ve made, and so on and so forth, over and over, again and again.
Life is like that, of course. One minute you feel grand and the next you’re harassed by familiar demons. But it doesn’t make for a compelling storyline.
Bear with me, if you will, while I get my bearings and conjure up the next post. I honestly don’t know when that will be, but I’m still around. I am loath to post unless I feel I have something to say and the time and energy to say it properly.
In the meantime, here’s a blurry photograph of a Paradise Tanager–we saw several, and several at once–taken from above the jungle canopy. The picture doesn’t do him justice at all.